Best day ever? Not so much.

I saw this article recently about wedding days.

At 33, I realize my family and friends probably assume I will never get married. And that's fine. I can't lie - I often assume that day will never come for me. I've really been thinking lately I probably don't want it to, at least not anytime soon. I am just SO COMFORTABLE doing exactly what I want all of the time, without answering to anyone. I also greatly enjoy always knowing what is in my fridge, always knowing that things are exactly how I left them, and always knowing exactly how many rolls of toilet paper I have.

I digress. Let's just pretend for a moment that I finally do find someone who wants to marry me. I am not going to be a great fiancé.

• First of all, I do not want a huge splashy engagement. I don't want anyone around. That's a very private moment and question, and there will only be two people in our marriage, so I don't want a crowd around to see my reaction. I will probably cry, or scream, or get really awkward, so I only want the man I love to see that.
• Second of all, I don't want a ring. I know, for most girls that's the main point of being engaged. I just don't want it. I've been told that if I get in a situation like that, my man may insist I wear a ring. I guess that's fine, but he can't spend more than $100 on it, and I would actually prefer $50-$75. I can't deal with an amount of money any larger than that being on my finger. I will lose it. I am not a jewerly person, so I will lose it, and then my man will be pissed, and then we will probably call of the wedding anyway.
• I am a planner. I can't help it. And the worst part about my planning skills is that I don't want help. I want to do everything myself; I don't think anyone can do it as well as I can; I don't want anyone's input. I assume most men don't really want to get involved in the wedding planning anyway.
• Since I am such an anal planner, I can't imagine that my wedding day is really going to be that much fun for me. I will be too worried about every detail. So, with that being said, I already know I don't want a huge wedding. I want to get married on a Sunday morning, and then we all go eat brunch.

I will, however, be an amazing wife. I won't get into details here, because I think my parents may read this blog.