Monday, January 7, 2013

Odd fears

Now that I get off work at 5p (winning), traffic is different than when I had to work til the middle of the night at Kaplan. I always get stuck in the same place on the interstate, and I always have the exact same thought...

"Oh my GOD, what would I do right now if the car beside me just pulled out a gun, to kill me drive by style, only I'm not moving, so really it's just cold blooded murder and I'm just sitting here singing Tay Swift and I'll never see it coming?!"

I am not kidding. Every day I have this thought. Also, my new place of employment is in the hood. So I assume at some point, I will get shot at.

Today when I was having these thoughts, I started thinking about all the other irrational fears I have. I have never even seen a gun in person, so I have no idea why I am so terrified of being shot. But I seriously think about it every single day. Other things I am irrationally afraid of...

1. A killer hiding in my shower. I have no reason to be scared of this. But when I get home, I have to check my shower.

2. Flushing the toilet in the middle of the night. Sorry, future husband. I don't do it. I pretend it's because I'm really into conserving water, but really it's this weird fear.

3. Changing lightbulbs. I am convinced that I will twist too hard and the lightbulb will shatter, and cut my hand into a million pieces, and then I will pass out from the blood. And no one will find me, because I live alone.

4. Kids dying in the middle of the night. Anytime I am responsible for a child overnight, I check their breathing at least once an hour. I don't know why I think they are going to just drop dead in the middle of the night, but it's seriously something I fret about when someone leaves me in charge of their children.

5. Playstation controllers. I don't know how to play a single playstation game, and I don't plan on ever learning. I think this fear stems from when I was at a boy's apartment one night, and he was at work. He didn't have cable, or a normal DVD player and I couldn't get any DVDs to work in his playstation except American History X. So I had to watch that movie, and it gave me nightmares for several weeks. SICK.

I am sure I have a billion more of these, but I just realized I haven't checked my shower in awhile so I need to go.


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