Friday, October 12, 2012

Mind yo' business, yo!

Okay, this entry may border on TMI, but whatever, no one reads it anyway.

Yesterday I was feeling a bit..sick. Or something. Just not quite right. So I went to Hyvee to get some tummy medicine before lunch. It was my only purchase, so I got in line and put it on the conveyor belt. The cashier greeted me, and as she rang up my stuff, an attractive fellow got in line behind me. She asked if I wanted a sack for my medicine.

"Yes," I said, hoping she would slip it in the bag before the hot guy noticed I was buying medicine to help with the blasts.

"Aw, someone must not be feeling good today, huh?" she asked, in a grandmotherly way.

UGH! I mumbled some crap lie about buying it for someone else and ran out the door. Seriously lady? You have to comment on my purchase when clearly it is embarrassing?

This seems to happen to me all the time. Maybe it's because I buy really ridiculous stuff, and usually that's all I'm buying so I can't like slip it in the middle of my order.

Like one time, I was at Walmart and I was buying...lube (I hope my parents aren't reading this). That's all I needed, and I was too stupid to just start buying shit so I wasn't walking up to the register with just a bottle of KY. As I stepped in line, I couldn't resist grabbing a beef stick. So there I was, lube and a beef stick. I was clearly handing the cashier a story to tell his friends later. So of course his comment was "This looks like a great night." Yes sir. Yes it does.

Of course, the worst is when I'm buying pregnancy tests. I don't buy them anymore, but I used to take them about once a month (I may be a drama queen) and really, I should have just been stocking up at Sams. But I always bought them at Walgreens, and the cashiers ALWAYS had a comment. Usually it was "good luck" or "hope you get what you want!". Give me a break, ladies. If that thing is positive, I am heading to the Mexican border.

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